


Something To Believe In

by sweetcarolanne



Category: The Ramones
Genre: Angelic Grace, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Gen, Hopeful Ending, Rock Stars, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-15
Updated: 2014-04-15
Packaged: 2018-01-19 11:41:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1468162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetcarolanne/pseuds/sweetcarolanne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Joey Ramone comes down from heaven to give hope to a suicidal young fan. Written to commemorate the death of, and celebrate the life of, beloved Joey Ramone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something To Believe In

Was it a dream? Was it a vision? I'll never know, but it was the most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me.

And it gave me the will to live when I thought I had lost it forever.

I remember waking up that fateful morning. It was April 15th; the sky outside was slate-grey and my heart was heavy. I wanted this very day to be my last on earth, and I didn't care any more about anything life had to offer. The world was just a joyless, Joey-less place and I didn't want to live in it.

Of course, I mourned for Dee Dee and Johnny as well, but Joey has always been my favorite Ramone. Just the thought of him, and knowing that he lived, makes me smile more than anything else ever could. He was sweetness and passion and talent and everything else that I've ever valued wrapped up into one amazing human being. The fact that he was gone was more heartbreaking than usual as I woke up in my bed and knew that the world had to stop because I wanted to get off.

I spent most of the early part of that day listening to the punk rock music I love so much, keeping the volume down and wearing headphones as I didn't want to wake the friends I lived with, and watching Ramones DVDs. Sadly, I had never got to see the Ramones live, but their videoed performances and music recorded live had always managed to thrill me. When it was time to go I put on the clothes I liked to wear most of all - my best Ramones T-shirt, ripped jeans, a leather jacket and Converse sneakers. I took one last look around my bedroom with all the posters on the wall, mostly of the Ramones and especially Joey, and bent to kiss my beloved Joey Ramone action figure goodbye. I had originally wanted to take him with me, but it was too sad to think of him being submerged at the bottom of a cold, dirty river. Closing the door behind me, I slipped out of the house as quietly as I could. I didn't bother to leave a note - it seemed pointless and self-pitying. I didn't want to make anybody sad - in my depressed and heartbroken state I just couldn't think of any other way to end the pain.

Hands tucked into my jacket pockets, I slunk up to the bridge and stood by the rail, looking around to make sure nobody was there. A slight fog was starting to rise around me, and I shivered. Taking a deep breath, I took my hands out of my pockets and gripped the rail of the bridge. Out loud I said, my voice shaking ever so slightly, "I love you, Joey Ramone, and I always will."

"You do? Then why are you abandoning me?"

_I knew that voice. It was unmistakable. Although it seemed impossible, it could only be him._

I turned, and there he was. Tall and lanky and beautiful, as he always was in life. Dressed in a leather jacket and ripped jeans just like I was wearing, but his T-shirt was the red and white striped one I had seen in so many photographs. He peered at me over the top of his rose-colored sunglasses and his lovely brown eyes seemed like they were full of tears. "Joey?" I whispered, and he pulled me close to him and hugged me gently. He murmured my name and moved one of his exquisitely long hands up to stroke my hair. Joey felt so warm and so real - I could smell the scent of his leather jacket and some kind of soap, and something that seemed to be like the very essence of heaven. I knew he was an angel, my guardian angel, even though he wasn't wearing a halo and wings. I knew, instinctively, that Joey was at peace now. No more sorrow for him, no more pain and no more OCD. My own OCD is something I've always struggled with, was one of the things that was pushing me over the edge, and knowing that he had it too in life made me feel sadder for his suffering than for mine, but less alone.

"You see - if all the fans did what you want to do, I'd be lost and forgotten. The Ramones wouldn't exist any more, but it's through people like you who love us that we get to live on," Joey told me. I whimpered and trembled, my own tears starting to spill. "But if you live and keep listening to our music, we'll never truly be gone. I'll always be there when you turn the music on and you hear my voice. I'll never leave you, not really. Stay on earth a while, until it's really your time to go, and that's not for a long time yet. Live for me, and I'll still be alive inside your heart."

Joey rocked me against him as I wept; he started singing softly the refrain of the song he wrote that I adore so, "LIfe's A Gas." I listened to every word, my heart slowly beginning to fill with joy and love for him. There were so many things I wanted to ask him. but I knew that they would wait till the day when I finally left this earth and would meet up with him again.

"Yes, you'll see me again some day - and until then, just put the music on and I'll be there," Joey whispered. I clung to him tightly, not wanting to open my eyes yet, because I knew that soon he would have to fade away. I also knew, however, that the warmth of him would still be with me when I left that bridge and made my way home. That wonderful feeling would stay inside my heart, and would come back every time I heard the songs that Joey sang.

I won't be sad, 'cause he'll be there.


End file.
